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You might be a Fundamentalist…

Growing up a fundamentalist had many unique traits that only someone with the same background could truly relate with and understand! Someone sent me a link to very funny thread on this message board called, “You might be a fundamentalist if…”

They are soooo funny! Here are a few of my favorites!!

You might be a fundamentalist…

  • If you’ve ever watched Sheffy on New Year’s Eve.
  • If you can tell a person’s spiritual condition by a passing glance at their CD rack.
  • If you actually believe NIV stands for Non-Inspired Version.
  • If none of the preachers you know called “Dr.” have earned degrees.
  • If you’ve ever worn cullottes, over snow pants, while skiing.
  • If you’ve roller skated to Majesty Music. (LOL!!!!!)
  • If you’ve heard more rock music played backward than forward.
  • If you ever dressed up as a Bible character in late October for “Harvest.”
  • If you know what a “six inch rule” is.
  • If you’ve had to get on your knees to have your skirt length measured, and you ever carried safety pins in your purse to pin necklines and skirt slits.
  • If you are scientifically certain that the hottest flame is black.
  • If you’ve ever raised your hand to indicate you’re not saved because you were distracted during the invitation. (Hasn’t this happened to everyone?!)
  • If you believe NaCl (or any simple chemical formula) will leap into flames when in contact with water on the face of a man who played with it at a party. (Ah! This was a Tom Farell illustration that scared the life out of me!)
  • If you know for a fact that rock music kills house plants.
  • If you have thrown a stick in either a fireplace or bonfire on a Friday night.
  • If you’ve heard it preached that the letters in “Santa” can easily be rearranged to spell “Satan.” (We still like to joke about that one…)
  • If you have sung ‘My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean’ at a youth rally.
  • If you have a Hollywood Video card in your wallet but think “not supporting Hollywood” is a good reason not to go to the theater.
  • If you’ve ever worn guys shorts (as a girl) so that they’d be long enough to “check.”
  • If you regularly tell co-workers that you went to a “small, private college,” instead of an Independent Fundamental Baptist Bible College in a town they’ve never heard of.

And last but not least…. You might be a fundamentalist if you are offended at this discussion!

You can see the crazy and hilarious thread here… Comment and let me know of your fav’s! Hope no one was really offended. We all need to be able to laugh at ourselves sometimes! :)

7 Responses to You might be a Fundamentalist…
  1. Rachel
    August 4, 2008 | 1:46 pm

    Oh my, I have a stitch in my side! That’s too funny!

    (Hmmm, no longer a “Fundy”, thank the Lord!)

  2. Sam
    August 4, 2008 | 2:26 pm

    I love it! I remember those days. I’m also glad those days are over.

  3. Bette Anne
    August 4, 2008 | 3:20 pm

    Gotta love all the craziness! Loved the last one though, and unfortunately so true!

    Thanks for a good laugh!

  4. Bakers
    August 4, 2008 | 3:21 pm

    How did you find my pedigree??? LOL. Those are too funny in a sad sort of way. It is too bad that “fundamentalist” has come to mean stuff like what is in that list instead of the fundamentals of the faith.

    My favorite pet peeve? All those honorary doctorates. :D

  5. The Barth Family
    August 4, 2008 | 5:10 pm

    TOO FUNNY! Although I didn't exactly grow up that way, a year at Bob Jones & another year of attending Danny's home church quickly acquainted me with all of these!

    I totally wore guys shorts at BJ & got called to the Dean of Women's office because it wasn't "ladylike."

    And I'll never understand the movie thing as long as I live. Maybe the profits from movie rentals go to hungry children in 3rd world countries?????

  6. Amy
    August 5, 2008 | 8:55 am

    I remember those days and am glad that they are over! I always hated the skirt checks.

  7. Kelly
    August 6, 2008 | 1:06 pm

    How about this one…
    You might be a fundamentalist if..
    You think Ron Hamilton is a celebrity. Ha ha. “Patch” definitely is a celebrity around our house! :) My favorite in the list is the raising your hand to indicate you aren’t saved. WHO KNOWS how many preachers thought I was unsaved and just didn’t come forward! Ha ha.

You might be a Fundamentalist…

Growing up a fundamentalist had many unique traits that only someone with the same background could truly relate with and understand! Someone sent me a link to very funny thread on this message board called, “You might be a fundamentalist if…”

They are soooo funny! Here are a few of my favorites!!

You might be a fundamentalist…

  • If you’ve ever watched Sheffy on New Year’s Eve.
  • If you can tell a person’s spiritual condition by a passing glance at their CD rack.
  • If you actually believe NIV stands for Non-Inspired Version.
  • If none of the preachers you know called “Dr.” have earned degrees.
  • If you’ve ever worn cullottes, over snow pants, while skiing.
  • If you’ve roller skated to Majesty Music. (LOL!!!!!)
  • If you’ve heard more rock music played backward than forward.
  • If you ever dressed up as a Bible character in late October for “Harvest.”
  • If you know what a “six inch rule” is.
  • If you’ve had to get on your knees to have your skirt length measured, and you ever carried safety pins in your purse to pin necklines and skirt slits.
  • If you are scientifically certain that the hottest flame is black.
  • If you’ve ever raised your hand to indicate you’re not saved because you were distracted during the invitation. (Hasn’t this happened to everyone?!)
  • If you believe NaCl (or any simple chemical formula) will leap into flames when in contact with water on the face of a man who played with it at a party. (Ah! This was a Tom Farell illustration that scared the life out of me!)
  • If you know for a fact that rock music kills house plants.
  • If you have thrown a stick in either a fireplace or bonfire on a Friday night.
  • If you’ve heard it preached that the letters in “Santa” can easily be rearranged to spell “Satan.” (We still like to joke about that one…)
  • If you have sung ‘My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean’ at a youth rally.
  • If you have a Hollywood Video card in your wallet but think “not supporting Hollywood” is a good reason not to go to the theater.
  • If you’ve ever worn guys shorts (as a girl) so that they’d be long enough to “check.”
  • If you regularly tell co-workers that you went to a “small, private college,” instead of an Independent Fundamental Baptist Bible College in a town they’ve never heard of.

And last but not least…. You might be a fundamentalist if you are offended at this discussion!

You can see the crazy and hilarious thread here… Comment and let me know of your fav’s! Hope no one was really offended. We all need to be able to laugh at ourselves sometimes! :)

7 Responses to You might be a Fundamentalist…
  1. Rachel
    August 4, 2008 | 1:46 pm

    Oh my, I have a stitch in my side! That’s too funny!

    (Hmmm, no longer a “Fundy”, thank the Lord!)

  2. Sam
    August 4, 2008 | 2:26 pm

    I love it! I remember those days. I’m also glad those days are over.

  3. Bette Anne
    August 4, 2008 | 3:20 pm

    Gotta love all the craziness! Loved the last one though, and unfortunately so true!

    Thanks for a good laugh!

  4. Bakers
    August 4, 2008 | 3:21 pm

    How did you find my pedigree??? LOL. Those are too funny in a sad sort of way. It is too bad that “fundamentalist” has come to mean stuff like what is in that list instead of the fundamentals of the faith.

    My favorite pet peeve? All those honorary doctorates. :D

  5. The Barth Family
    August 4, 2008 | 5:10 pm

    TOO FUNNY! Although I didn't exactly grow up that way, a year at Bob Jones & another year of attending Danny's home church quickly acquainted me with all of these!

    I totally wore guys shorts at BJ & got called to the Dean of Women's office because it wasn't "ladylike."

    And I'll never understand the movie thing as long as I live. Maybe the profits from movie rentals go to hungry children in 3rd world countries?????

  6. Amy
    August 5, 2008 | 8:55 am

    I remember those days and am glad that they are over! I always hated the skirt checks.

  7. Kelly
    August 6, 2008 | 1:06 pm

    How about this one…
    You might be a fundamentalist if..
    You think Ron Hamilton is a celebrity. Ha ha. “Patch” definitely is a celebrity around our house! :) My favorite in the list is the raising your hand to indicate you aren’t saved. WHO KNOWS how many preachers thought I was unsaved and just didn’t come forward! Ha ha.